6:54 AM

Some movement with shaking

Posted by Holly Homer |



Ryan (7) is an intensely smart boy. He has never had a relaxed moment in his life. That is just the way he is. Very quick witted. Very prickly to hug. He will someday rule the world if I can just get him through this stage of life. He is a mover and shaker.

He is great at moving and shaking others.

He is not so great at being moved and shaked himself.

That is where the intensity comes in. All problems must be handled STAT. All problems are packaged with screams, pleads and loud complaints. All problems must be solved ASAP or the world that he will soon rule is likely to end.

A fly in the car. A bruise on his knee. A inequality in food portion.


Last week I was driving the minivan and Ryan was in the back seat.

Mommy! I have something in my eye! OUCH, etc. etc. etc.

Ryan, put your finger into your shirt, put it to your eye and GENTLY touch your eye without rubbing.

Mommy! I have something in my eye! OUCH, etc. etc. etc. That is NOT helping!

Ryan, please try again. I can't help you until we stop.

Mommy! I have something in my eye! OUCH, etc. etc. etc. That is NOT helping!

Ryan, try to blink your eyes to make tears in them.

*all screaming stops in the back of the van*

Mommy, if you want me to get more water or tears in my eyes why don't you ask me to yawn?

Does yawning increase your tears?

Yes MOM! (as in DUH) Yawning works much better then blinking.

*attempted yawning festival throughout the van which includes 3 boys and me*

*I end up yawning first*

Wow Ryan. You are right. That is pretty cool.

*Ryan finally yawns*

Mommy! I have something in my eye! OUCH, etc. etc. etc. That is not helping.


So the genius idea HE came up with didn't work but it bought me a few moments of peace in the car. I continued to talk him off the ledge for a few more minutes while I drove to our destination. Meanwhile, I heard this from the back seat...

BOO!

BOO!

BOO
!

Ryan! Why are you scaring your brother?

I am scaring the yawns out of him.

That is for hiccups.

Oh.


P.S. Don't tell Ryan, but it also works for getting things out of his eye.

45 comments:

Happy Campers said...

LOVE those boys! :)

Natalie said...

i vote for Ryan for president. he seems like the best choice!

jill jill bo bill said...

That is so funny! I also have birthed one of those "stop the world, I have an issue" kid. I think that's why I am teetering on the insanity fence. It's so hard to convince her it's all about me....

spinning in our own direction said...

HA HA HA .. Oh.... My side hurts.... I am so there with you .. ha Ha

Angie @ KEEP BELIEVING said...

Naturally, all of your readers are yawning now.

KEEP BELIEVING

Manic Mommy said...

Ryan and HRH are brothas from anotha mutha. They probably have a similar plan:

HRH is going to send RC in first to lay waste to civilization as we know it, then come in to create the New World Order.

Shauna said...

I got that small glimpse of Ryan on our playdate. Trying to remember the situation. Tickets? Disappearing? Mass chaos? :)

Burgh Baby said...

Ryan is going to make a mighty fine husband some day. Yup, the Hurry Up It's a Disaster thing works very well for husbands.

Jyl @ MommyGossip said...

That is hilarious! Scaring the yawn out. Love it.

Suzie said...

Sounds like a peacful car ride can I come next time

Karen said...

We are no strangers to dramatic reactions in this house. Just try to take a Goldfish or chip from my youngest, and you will be regaled with wails that make you want to stick ice picks in your ears.

the planet of janet said...

god, i think he's possibly one of my children!!!!!

ParentingPink said...

HaHaHaHa! I have three girls and I can relate to the whole STAT thing - except our little "emergencies" usually revolve around broken necklaces!

Courtney said...

What a cute story. He is right about the yawning. Just the word yawn made me yawn!

Valarie said...

Laughing hysterically over here! "I am scaring the yawns out of him." That is priceless :)

Louise said...

Hilarious! *YAWN* And thank you so much that all last night and all *YAWN* morning when I rode my *YAWN* bike to school to drop of Chic, *YAWN* "I Want to Know What Potluck Is" was *YAWN* going through my head *YAWN* over and over. *BIIIIIIGGGGGg YAWN* Holy Cow. I think I need a nap. Maybe I need Ryan to scare the *YAWNS* out of me!

Heather said...

Your post made me yawn. They really are contagious.

Mekhismom said...

How funny! Your son is so cute and clearly diversion works.

Jenn @ Juggling Life said...

So it's not just watching people yawn that's contagious--it's reading about it too!

Lisa@verybusymomwith4 said...

I too am yawny and getting very sleepy....cute tale!

Anonymous said...

are you hrh on bugsys club? If so LOL

Rachel said...

I'm rolling.

Holly, you have the cutest kids and the greatest storytelling ability.

'Scaring the yawns out of him'

I'm just giggling hysterically :-)

anglophilefootballfanatic.com said...

This would be the one who bribed you during potty training, right? Sounds like the personality is even MORE developed at 7.

The Mom said...

OMG that is such a conversation from our car!! LOL!

On a limb with Claudia said...

ahahahahahahahahaha Your kids are as hilarious as you are. Have they adjusted to school schedule again? ((hug)) You do a great job Holly!

On a limb with Claudia said...

I ... just... have... nothing ... to ... add....

But... how does the inflatable dragon relate to your bumm??

Happy Campers said...

Where did the links go to all the blogs you read? That was my personal blog roll that you were maintaining for me! I miss it...bring it back purty please! :)

Beth (A Mom's Life) said...

Ha! That's great!

And he is so handsome!

anymommy said...

You and your boys crack me up. I'm now waiting to yawn to see if I tear up!

InTheFastLane said...

Ryan sounds a lot like my 9 year old. Intense.

JenniBeanV said...

I have one JUST like him...LOL!

Elaine A. said...

He sounds like my Ben. And for that reason I say, God bless you soul.

Jennifer H said...

That song is bound to be stuck in my head for days. Uh, thanks.

I still can't believe no randomly selected comments have landed in your fruit bowl.

Pinky said...

you made me snicker out loud.
did we freak out like this as kids?
Because mine do it, too.
arrrrg.

Colleen said...

Well, you know he'd be quick to get things done if he were in the White House!

Salubrina said...

ryan sounds like a cool kid to hang around.

great post!

glad he was able to employ his groovin' problem solving skills.

Lizz @ Yes, and So is My Heart said...

Oh funny. Great pic.

JCK said...

Somehow all of this sounds very familiar....

Glad Mama survived the car ride. Or did she?

Mel, A Dramatic Mommy said...

My son is sort of the same. Life must stop if his socks are bunched up in his shoe.

Threeundertwo said...

Note for future: This is not the child who should call 911 if there ever is a real emergency.

Ron Davison said...

Holly,
I love the idea of him telling you what to tell him. It is brilliant, really. Do what you want but still have someone to blame.
In fact, I'm pretty sure you could offer this as a service - giving people permission to do what they want to do anyway, but accepting the blame as instigator. It would be like having a personal coach but exactly different. Perhaps I could be the first to make an appointment?

AMomTwoBoys said...

Ahhhh....the art of distraction. Works every time.

Here's to hoping it's a LONG time before they figure that out.

AMomTwoBoys said...

Oh, Holly. I never doubted my love for you, but you've totally sealed your spot in my heart with the use of an Air Supply song.

And now I'm going to have the song in my head all day. The normal version, though. Not the potluck version.

MoscowMom said...

That's so funny! I love the picture! He looks so grown up...

Tranny Head said...

So - I yawned while reading this post. it sucked because I then had watery eyes and couldn't read as well.

Just thought I'd share.

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