There is a disturbing trend. A disturbing trend that is reaching into every area of Holly's shopping life.

And just a piece of advice: You don't mess with Holly's shopping life.

Holly first noticed it at the gas station.

Is Holly complaining about the high price of gas?

Nope.

This is Holly's blog!

There are no perkiness-deflating discussions of world peace, global warming, religion or gas prices here.

Holly is disturbed by a disturbing trend at the gas station that has nothing to do with the price of gas.

In fact, Holly thinks the gas stations should pay her for enduring this disturbing trend:



Why is the gas pump yelling at Holly?

Holly gets out of the car to fill up her minivan...

...and all of a sudden she is starring in a commercial for that very gas station.

*cue VERY LOUD audio*

*cue VERY LOUD video (optional)*

Holly doesn't like to complain, but sometimes the audio and the video just shout at each other and Holly steps out of the fray until they are done.

If Holly were listening, she might learn that the gas station only serves the highest quality gas.

If Holly were listening, she might learn that inside the station there are snacks of the highest quality.

If the gas station were listening, they might offer to babysit 3 minivan strapped-in children because Holly is desperate for snacks of any quality.

Holly actually started avoiding the screaming gas stations because quite honestly all she wants to do is fill up her car and pay at the pump. She has little time to referee the audio vs. video fight.

Then Holly had to go get some face soap at a local drugstore. She was walking down the face soap aisle when she nearly had heart failure because of this:



The face soap AISLE began screaming at Holly to try this new product that would make her even more desirable than she already is.

At least that is what Holly assumed it was saying since she ran in terror from the aisle without her face cream.

And then Holly went shopping at the grocery store:



Not only did the frozen food section start screaming at her, but it also spit coupons in her general direction.

Holly doesn't mind the occasional coupon, but the spitting has to stop.

This is the part where Holly offers advice to companies that are screaming at her while shopping:



Stop screaming at me!

Do I have to put my hands over my ears and say, "La. La. La." outside the house too?

Because my arms are really tired.


Tune in next Tuesday when Holly offers advice to government...

45 comments:

Lisa said...

Heehee! I know the gas station you are talking about and I always leave the car radio on there--my kids are always asking 'who's there'
'highest quality snacks inside the gas station store'--that just proves gas voice is a LIAR ;)

pam said...

Lurker Delurking because this made me laugh out loud and I REALLY needed it this morning, thanks!

Kalynne Pudner said...

I hear ya, Sistah! And how 'bout them cows that MOOOO at you when you open the glass door to grab your six gallons of milk for the week? Is that insulting, or what? (When the cows start mooing in the ice cream section, I'm writing some Dairy Dude a sharp-toned letter, for sure.)

baby~amore' said...

LOL -that's bad but I love your illustrations ... have you seen any blogs with the audio ads yet ?

Beth said...

I have not been harrassed yet by talking gas pumps. But I can't stand those things that spit out the coupons. Very annoying!

I'll be tuning on on Tuesday to see what advice you have for our government.

standing still said...

Oh yea. The gas station that does this here in Minnesota plays a local WEATHER blurb. Loud enough with enough "severe storms coming" to frighten the already nervous enough about weather Teenager sitting in the front seat saying, "What's he say? What's coming? Are we having a tornado?" As if I need more of that aggrevation.

Greta said...

Pretty soon, they will be offering to pay us to put adds on our foreheads.

spinning in our own direction said...

HA HA HA !! that is so funny.. poor Holly.. Everyone yells at her all the time and if that s not bad enough she has to find quiet time where people are suppose to be really loud and yell.. There is just something wrong with that..

Jenn @ Juggling Life said...

Holly brilliantly illustrated exactly what I'm thinking.

Courtney said...

I'm sorry you had to suffer through that. I'm glad that nothing has started screaming at me yet.

About the gas prices, lower them and take out the stupid video, audio screaming thing. Glad that's what they buy with their profits!

Madge said...

it's really all to stressful. hate hate hate those talking things.

cce said...

I know, I know...it seems that just when we all get serious about resisting superfluous though high quality snacks and face cream, the manufacturers just get louder and more aggressive which actually bolsters our resistance rather making us more interested in face cream and snacks. It's like the opposite of successful marketing with noise pollution to boot.

Soliloquy said...

It's official.

Holly's blog is Soliloquy's favorite blog to read.

Happy Campers said...

Is THIS what you guys were talking about at the party yesterday in the cabana? I was trying to figure out what advertising talk was going on, but I missed too much of it for it to make sense!

Suzie said...

Here we have signs outside of the subway that advertise. IN the STREET!!!!!! I just want some quiet!Is that too much to ask?

Kim said...

Stinkin' hilarious!

franticallysimple said...

Amen to that!

On a limb with Claudia said...

We are TV free - have been for... um... six years. So all of that is so loud and so distracting for us. We turn off TVs at doctor's offices that just yell at us. I shop a tiny organic market to avoid all the noise and flashing lights. It's amazing how sensitive I am to it when other people just hum along.

Once again, you are my hero for your active voice in this issue. Someone said once that if Snow White woke from her 100 yr nap, the noise of modern civilization would make her mad. I feel like that sometimes.

Sarah said...

Oh I've been lucky to have only run into this once...but it is SO.ANNOYING! Ugh. You're right...all companies should stop doing that...immediately.

Valarie said...

I have never been to a gas station where the pump talks to me. I don't think I want to after hearing this.

Because I have never been to a gas station (or seen one for that matter) that screams at me, and that the closest Ikea store is about 4 hours away, does that mean I live in the boonies? :)

#2 said...

Amen. I stopped going to my grocery store because of the televisions in every aisle. I have a new my grocery store that doesn't yell at me.

Clearly, the marketing people forgot that sometimes we go to the grocery store not because we actually need groceries, but because we need a moment of not yelling!

Brenda said...

What?! Did the face soap aisle screaming thing REALLY think it could make Holly even more desirable? RIDICULOUS! (Unless, of course, it was a live-in, very cute eyebrow waxer-guy.)

Beck said...

This is why I'm glad I live in the sticks, where all of our screaming is done by crazy dudes, the old fashioned way.

the planet of janet said...

STOP THE MADNESS!!!!!!!!!

whew, i feel better now. all that yelling was getting to me!

Mama Zen said...

You are hysterical!

A Mom Two Boys said...

That must be a Texas thing because my drugstore and grocery store have never spoken to me. Although I really wouldn't mind if the freezer section said "Your tush would appreciate it if you DID NOT buy that ice cream." THAT I'd be all for.

P.S. Just for you I said "tush" instead of what I really wanted to say. You are welcome. Hi Holly's Mom!

Jennifer H said...

Oh, seriously. I believe you just wrote a great big shut the bleep up. Too much noise.

Don't even get me started on the holiday aisle at Halloween or Christmas. More than once I've had the bejesusmaryandjoseph scared out of me when some talking mask or Santa goes off.

Veronica said...

I have never been assaulted by machines yelling at me.

People need to come live in Tasmania.

(can you tell I am trying to convince all the bloggers to come keep me company over here?)

Memarie Lane said...

Nothing has yelled at me yet here in NM, but this is a very zen state on the whole. In FL there was a gas station that tried the talking thing, but they removed it after a couple months so I'm guess the feedback was not promising.

Tranny Head said...

Damn dirty marketing executives . .. they're just bitter because we all have Tivo now and don't watch their TV commercials. And by "we" I mean "not me" since I don't have one and now am being marketed in every facet of my existence including internet, tv, phone . . .

Bastards. I keep getting these greedy farts calling me asking me for charity money. Don't they know I'm the one in need of charity?!

OHmommy said...

Amen to that!

I am loving your illustrations. Well done. ;)

Talina said...

Ha, I am also loving your illustrations plus you have a good point! The sensory overload is enough to make you want to wear your IPOD on all your outings so you can block EVERYTHING out!

Lizz @ Yes, and So is My Heart said...

Are you serious? I've never encountered this. That is a good thing, because I frequently leave the house for some peace and quiet.

Funny post.

Melody said...

Those silly gas pump things always make me think of the Tonight Show thing, where they have TVs at gas stations and then they mess with people while they are pumping their gas. I'm always worried I'm on some sort of weird "Candid Camera" thing.

As always, love the illustrated posts...

Lynn said...

Loved this post -- hilarious.

EatPlayLove said...

This is the exact reason why my daughter does not have a "talking kitchen", but instead one made from wood. Obviously random object are going to be talking to her for the rest of her life.

Elizabeth said...

Love the illustrations once again...especially Holly with her hands over her ears saying LaLaLa...

I am blessed to live near enough to NJ that I never even have to pump my own gas. I pull in, instruct attendant...shut window...AHHH.
I hate when things yell at me, and those stupid coupon thingies at the grocery store that just attract my children... but I do love the automated shipping machine at the Post Office. It is quiet, polite, and sends my packages out at 11pm if I need it to!
Blessings, EJT

Betsy Bird said...

What? An obnoxious marketing technique that hasn't yet reached my state? Something to look forward to!

Jerseygirl89 said...

How I LOVE your pictures. Also, I am now so happy to live in NJ where gas must be pumped by sullen teenagers instead of by yours truly. They may be grumpy and slow, but at least they don't try to sell me anything.

Reluctant Housewife said...

Gosh! Poor Holly!

Earplugs, maybe?

Can't help with the spitting coupons.

Purple Teacup said...

This is why we moved to the Alien Planet. It does not exist yet here.

{Karla} said...

it's all deafening.

i agree. must.stop.the. yelling.

xo K

Tootsie Farklepants said...

One of our local gas stations blasts disco music at me. I may bust into the hustle one of these days.

JCK said...

Oh, this was GOOD!

Jenny, the Bloggess said...

Featured on Good Mom/Bad Mom on the Houston Chronicle.

http://tinyurl.com/6mb75y

Post a Comment