Two weeks ago I outlined my shoe management system. Failure can be quick and ruthless. Shame on you failure for being so quick. Shame on you failure for being so ruthless...

The bottom line was that the three boys had chosen the same dark blue color crocs. I was continually getting the sizes mixed up so I ordered expensive Jibbitz to identify each pair.

Here are the three pair of dark blue crocs with the Jibbitz today:



Why aren't they all dark blue?

Where are all those Jibbitz?

What is going on?

By the time the Jibbitz arrived Rhett had lost his dark blue crocs. Total loss. Searched the house high and low lost. Searched the car high and low lost. Lost. Lost. Lost.

So I grabbed elephant's shoes...

...and crushed the poor toddler's feet into them. He was going to wear them until we found the dark blue crocs. Foot pain and stunting of growth are secondary to purchasing ANOTHER pair when a perfectly good pair is lost. Lost. Lost.

No dark blue crocs showed up.

So he stumbled around in his ill-fitting elephant shoes right into sidewalk caulk. Sidewalk caulk?

Yes, sidewalk caulk.

Only it took me an hour and sixteen napkins stuck to various points of his bare feet to figure out what the heck he had stepped into. It smelled like paint. It was sticky. It was everywhere. I stripped him of his ill-fitting elephant shoes and he walked out of the restaurant we were in with a bunch of small pieces of napkins adhered to his little feet by sidewalk caulk.

When we got home I set the shoes aside to dry. I would deal with them later.



Only sidewalk caulk doesn't dry.

Ever.

No dark blue crocs showed up.

The child was shoeless except for a pair of dress shoes.

So I purchased the orange crocs hoping that they would be easier to spot when attempting escape. I consider it a kind of orange jumpsuit for little boy's shoes.

So where are the Jibbitz? Rhett refuses to wear them. Full refusal. Throw tantrum if they come within a 10 foot radius refusal. Never mind...pick battles carefully. Pick battles carefuly. Pick battles carefully.

Look a little closer at the ONLY dark blue pair of crocs I have left...



...hmmmm. Those aren't the same size. Calling them a pair is generous. Which is why Reid's last year crocs that he still fits into are also pictured.

Please note that the larger size dark blue croc sports a Megatron Jibbitz while the smaller dark blue croc is decorated with an Autobot badge Jibbitz. This is all wrong on so many levels.

Holly's shoe management system for boys (H.S.M.S.F.B.) is officially a failure. This has been the post-mortem.

Please learn from my mistakes and avoid a shoeless elephant...

42 comments:

the planet of janet said...

first of all... i'm first! second... i'm at the top of your blogroll (for the moment).

and third? oh, this story is such a croc ....

(sorry, it was too obvious and i couldn't help myself. must have been the heady experience of seeing me on your sidebar)

jenn said...

I always love starting my day here...I needed a good laugh!

Lizz @ Yes, and So is My Heart said...

Not long ago my son accidentally kicked one of his shoes down a storm drain. It was gone, there was no retrieving it. So, he is wearing too small imitation crocs. I tried to replace them, but the "crocs" at Payless are a different style now that are tough to get my son's feet into. Tell me, why are companies constantly trying to fix things that aren't broken, why Holly why? Because we both know that if I buy him the real crocs he will kick one down a drain or worse. Yours is not the only shoe management system that is failing. :)

SuburbanCorrespondent said...

Well, it seemed like a good idea at the time...

So are jibbitz crocs bling?

frogpondsrock said...

Thanks for the giggle holly.. I wonder where the crocs go? My purple pair of crocs just vanished pffft into thin air..
I wonder if all crocs vanish? Or if it is just the blue and the purple ones mmmmm very mysterious...

cheers kim

Jenny, the Bloggess said...

When Hailey's crocs don't fit I just break off the back strap.

Instant extra inch.

Brittany said...

OMG this post made me laugh so hard I cried. This is SO my life! Why did I buy them both the identical pairs of crocs???

Courtney said...

This post made me laugh, but I am sorry for your failure. Let's face it failing sucks!!!

Sarah said...

Oh my...the demise of your wonderful system was swift and complete, wasn't it?!!? So sorry!! That tiny thread of sanity? Well, I hope you're able to cling to it *G*

Jenn @ Juggling Life said...

I think I'm too old to understand Crocs.

Angie @ KEEP BELIEVING said...

The jibbitz are doomed to fail anyway. The boys love to look at them, but hate wearing them. I find them all over the yard and down the street. I think they used them like Hansel and Gretel to find their way home.

KEEP BELIEVING

Mylhibug said...

So does this mean that Elephant doesn't get his Crocs back?

Lisa@verybusymomwith4 said...

maybe it is time go barefoot?!

Jack said...

I am a huge fan of Crocs- comfortable to wear and easy as heck to get on a squirming kids feet.

Burgh Baby's Mom said...

Crocs are the devil's shoes, I tell ya'. Not only are they hideous (Oh, yes, I said it), the Toddler can put them on herself. Which she does. All the time. And what color Crocs did Mr. Husband buy her (I would never buy the devil's shoes)? Bright frickin' blue. It looks -oh so- lovely with her dainty yellow dress, or her bright green pants, or her adorable red outfit. I wish those stupid shoes would just get lost already. Could you arrange for that?

Burgh Baby's Mom said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Valarie said...

I so agree croc are of the devil!!

My husband bought our son a new pair of crocs. Said son was with said husband at time of purchase. So how did said husband come home with said crocs for said son that are two sizes to big and also the color orange which do not look good with anything that the child owns. He looks like he has duck feet, they are so big and bright. Does he want to where them all the time? Yes!! Does he have a mother who is a fanatic about matching? Yes!! :o)

Manic Mommy said...

More than anything, it was the post...mortem that made me laugh.

Also, RC is strutting around in his new navy crocs. I hated them but I must say that you're preaching to the converted.

Elaine A. said...

It was a good system in theory. Some little boys just had to go and mess it up! Geez! ; )

Maybe you could velcro the pairs together. Certainly there's less chance of them "walking off" that way, right??

anglophilefootballfanatic.com said...

You certainly can come over to my neck of the woods & visit the outlet. Where they also have the Jibbitz.

jubilee said...

Sigh . . . the crocophant is no more . . . sigh

My two children who own croc knock-offs have nasty blisters from the shoes and still insist on wearing them - do I let them wear socks with their crocs? Or do they go "missing"? The crocs, I mean, not the kids. On second thought . . . nah.

Elizabeth said...

Hated the look of crocs,had to change my mind thanks to Kalynne. Have to admit the three year old loves them. He picked out Camoflage, of course! I love that he can put them on himself! The girls got pink, but different styles. Tilly's are cute enough for church! Sorry the system failed...
Blessings, E

Momo Fali said...

Oh my! The Crocs people LOVE you, don't they?

foolery said...

The story isn't complete until the lost lost lost blue Crocs show up one size later than youngest child (and they WILL).

On a Limb with Claudia said...

I love your crocs but must advise you against your stock purchase. The company is here and is very pourly run. They just got bought out - then lost sooooo much money it's not very funny. Sigh.

Let's just hope they stay in business long enough for the boys to grow out of them! :)

laughingatchaos said...

Oh sweet Lord. So...mentioning that you can recycle Crocs is kinda pointless then, huh?
Anti-Jibbitz? Wait til school starts and he sees all his friends with them, then you'll go broke. Just sayin'.

Nap Warden said...

Gotta tell you...I don't know how you do it. I have a hard enough time keeping track of one boy's shoes and one girl's shoes:O

Happy Campers said...

I keep meaning to tell you...I picked up an airplane jibbitz on the ground at Corner Bakery last week! I think it belongs to you...

Sorry, no extra crocs though ;)

Rebecca said...

I don't own a pair of Crocs. Never have. Will you still be my friend? ;)

Shannon said...

I own 3 pairs of Crocs. My two youngest have one pair each. I have the holey one and the non-holey ones. I have jibbets in coffee motif!
I love my Crocs!

Now watch you buy all new Crocs and those AWOL blue ones Show up!

Tranny Head said...

Man - I'd tell those kids if they lose their shoes again they will be wearing sidewalk caulk on their feet for the entire summer . . . and then I'd make sure to emphasize the fact that asphalt is very hot in the summer.

I kid! (Sort of)

Jennifer H said...

You just need to invent a Crocs Tracking Device (or CTD). Maybe you could work with Jibbitz to develop a Jibbitz with a CTD.

Don Mills Diva said...

I don't think I can get past that picture of the elephant in the crocs - too funny!

Mommy Cracked said...

I'm crying laughing because my son managed to find his missing Croc from last summer and tried to pair it with this summer's size...both the same color, of course. You are not alone.

JCK said...

Man, you have all the fun at your house. I love Crocs, too. Don't tell Tootsie. She'll kill us. Or put us on her worst dressed list!

Sleeping with Ward Cleaver said...

I love your elephant in crocs picture. He looks so ginormous! And most impressive Mr. Potato Crocs...
maybe it's time for flip flops?

VDog said...

You're really making me look forward to the day when my son can lose his shoes.

Really.

Donna(mom24boyz) said...

just found your blog....too funny post! Made me giggle today!

Loralee Choate said...

My son has been BEGGING for a pair of crocs for forever and a day. I probably need to buy him a pair, huh?

Jennifer said...

wow.


yeah.. um...


wow.

that is all i got.

you are too good! :) you make me laugh... and I really needed a good laugh. thanks.

and seriously... i'm totally laughing with you!! only b/c things like this happen to us all the time...

so if ever you ask yourself...

only me???

nah!! not only you... us too!! :0)

although at the present time we have no shoeless elephants... but that is subject to change at any given moment...

xoxoxo

Karen said...

Let me just say that I am also completely insane when it comes to maintaining knowledge of the whereabouts of my cherubs' Crocs. Those things are stinkin' expensive for such tiny feet, and my girls where them every day. They will continue to wear them every day until they outgrow them. Your posts are always so hysterical! Love the "pair" at the end!

Louise said...

When I saw this post I thought, "How is Holly going to beat the crocs dead horse?"

But she did it well. The non-matching dark blue crocs made my husband come see what was wrong with me since I was laughing so hard.

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